the end :)

when i leave this land ..
when my time is up..
will you shed a tear for me..

will it be a tear of remembrance..
or will you cry for others see..

he looked down.. there attending his funeral were a handful few, he hadn't had the best of lives to earn him any admirers but lucky he claimed was his being for he had the love of some really special people..



spoke his father..
his strength.. a little worn..

he was my soul..
a part of me..
my seed ..my own soil..
i nurtured him..he fed my core..
with love more than this universe dares store..

now he leaves me.. and joins his mother..
i guess i will follow you..
but just know my son.. you were all i hath.. and am proud of life and death with you

for all my being.. my existence you were..
the reason i did ever breathe..
but live lot more..and smile greater.. in all generations ..i promise we meet
so he sent down a dew..with love..with care..and sent down a kiss ..ice sheet


he hath my soul..
and he never did even knew..
i loved him with tears silent..
oblivious his being ..
i kissed his air..as one-sided my love grew..

you walked ahead..
and paced with grace..
as flings you got into..
you wondered why i stood still in time..
why no hand i held..
of what was wrong..
you saw it all.. and felt everything..
but never saw me waiting for you..

spoke his beloved childhood friend..
someone maybe he loved too...

with a drop of dew he sent down love..love pure..virgin.. untouched..
chaste a story ..he smiled ..with clouds..and with a silent thunder.. 'i love you too'


brother..you were..
much more than yet..
you and i shared no blood ..no reason to stand together..
yet together we were..as fate ensured..
and together you said ..end we would..

now gone you are..
and alone i stand..
with tears of gratitude..
but trust me ..soul mate..
if heavens would let..
i would trade my breath for you...

spoke with care..spoke ..now weak..
his friend of years.. his partner of dreams

another dew he sent now .. this one bright with mischief.. with pranks and talks..and trifles and love.. a dew too tangled.. yet so sweet..
love was all you had.. by brother who shared soul..
incomplete was i..nothing at all.. when you came ..spelled it whole..


master you were..
being mine..
i was someone who wouldn't even speak..
yet your hands moved ..
through white fur of me..
and i felt heaven as you would call thee..

thought his mate.. a dog ..he stared..
with eyes of most pure love..with paws perfect..
and a smile that missed with most pain..
and eyes that lost all glee..

a dew now sent .. with care ..most love.. for gratitude to now speak.. and thank his mate.. for selfless love.. and thank him for his being..
your fur i will..always find my heaven in..and love you for your silent speech

but now as he spoke..
some deceive poured in..
his best friend..or so he thought..

malice was in the heart of his wife..
shocked he was..
turned a turn..
and with rage he let out a cry...

and more of odium showered in..
as people other..paced in..
thunder grew dense..
storms blew thin..
and all he wanted was his handful few...

then an angel came in..
and held his hand...
said time was up..
and time to go..

he had one wish..
one final call..
asked him to demand so..

suddenly calm..
and tranquil his heart..
he said..
'just take care of my four'


and then it rained all night..
some sweet dew drops..
on four special people with pure hearts..
but rained even more..
a forgiving cleanse.. on those who didn't love..
and those who needed love..

for death now brought..
realisation of..
there is so much we
fail to see..
fail to speak..
fail to feel ..even more..

and once it is late..
too late it is..
forgive.. and love..
and spread some bliss...

for you know never..
when time does come..
and when it is too late..
to thank someone

it ain't all that late...

Masks for a face.. you realise how the world works..
Alas it is too late…

So were you a joke…
For the heart you kept close..
And was it all a façade..
When you thought heavens rose..

No..no..dear soul..
Hold on a little more..
And smile a little longer..
There’s still a lot in store..

The storm will give way to seas..
And you feel what you couldn’t be..
Your hands will rise.. a hand to hold..
Mystical warmth to shadow the cold..

Listen thy noble core..
These people who leave you…
They aren’t yet ready for truth…
And the love you keep in there..

So my dearest fella..
My gem of a heart..
Smile a little..
Yet another start…

And hell no..
I do not say..
You do not wait..
I just say erase the dismay…

So wait for the impossible..
My proud little spirit..
And hug your sads..for all the warmth they can spare..
They ask for hundred..a million you give it..

But nada..you stop..
And don’t you give up..
This cyclone clears..
And pure light shows through…

A magical world..
White clad men…
Where pure is the soul..
And pure are emotion…

Where none will laugh..
Where you will smile..
And all of it waits for you..
lest you surrender this mile…








:) stay happy :)

TO THE BHAUKAAL PURUSH

we were both idiots when i first saw you..
i close my eyes...
and the flashback starts...
you're standing there..
in the canteen in burger air..

see mosquito bites...
see stale pantry..debate banners..
i see you blabbering about sachin tendulkar..
and little did i know...

that you were swappu..
you were going to be my best friend..
and then PD said..
stay away from delhi girls..
i was laughing and choking..
somewhat ho ho ho ho...

and i said..
swappu take me somewhere i can find MR. S.V.M..
i'll be waiting..all there's left is his girlfriend to be dumped..
you'll be bobby and i'll be michael jackson...
it's a silly story...swappu just say yesh...done ;)

i scream out when i see a call from you..
we never keep quiet ..cause we're already brain dead ..they already know...
so close your eyes..
and escape sanity forever and smile...

cause you were swappu..
i was THE BESTEST DEBATOR ((he he ha ha ha))
and then that PD said ..stay away from delhi girls
you were anyway losing to me..
i was laughing as you spoke on your turn..
and i said..

swappu take me somewhere i can find MR. S.V.M..
i'll be waiting..all there's left is his girlfriend to be dumped..
you'll be bobby and i'll be michael jackson...
it's a silly story...swappu just say yesshhh done...;)

swappu.. now save me..
they try to get me see the REAL 0_0
this world is difficult.. and feels euucckk...
i am so afraid.. and that MONSTROUS mess..
it is just our silly story na..
swappu make me say YESH :(


you got tired of waiting..
but hey i called exactly at 1 am..
you're bhaukaal was fading
when my torra took over the town..
and i said...

swappu please save me..
i have' been feeling SHO SHO SHO ALONE...
i keep studying.. but mr. maths is SHO hard to come
is there absolutely nothing in my head.. i dunno how to think..

you knelt to the ground and told me about the story of that ring..

and said.. dian laugh now
you look better that way ..just bhaukaal
i love you..and i know you know thats just all
i talked to the darn god.. go study some physics
this is A HAPPY STORY... say yesh yesh yesh yesh... :p


oh oh oh oh
cause' we were both idiots when i first saw you


((btw bhai.. i made some stuff from your pics... lmao.. bhai bhai bhai... tumhey mujh par bharosa hota hee kyun hey))

and dear god..may MR. S.V.M and his girlfriend stay strong forever and ever..
may god bless all these kids.. just a silly song.. please god..please please know tht

10 things...

10 things…


I love

1. Family ((includes my angels and animals))
2. emotions
3. honesty
4. payal mam
5. cricket
6. crying :p
7. making a difference
8. being wrong
9. singing
10. dancing.. like just dancing ...and dancing in the most carefree manner.. with my hands swaying.. hair gone haywire.. jumping and shouting...

i believe in

1. karma
2. astrology/tarot ((staunch believer))
3. being honest no matter what price one has to pay..odium esp. should be naked
4. lying for someone's happiness is better than a truth ((i know contradictory but something i strongly believe in))
5. expressing myself.. ((makes me assure myself..i live))
6. somethings do last forever.. like love :)
7. girls and guys can be just friends.. ((yes and very good friends :) ))
8. bowing down in front of people you is always worth it
9. those who hate me..should know i am sorry...
10. not everything happens for the best


i am thinking of write now...

1. i have my microphone's puff on my finger and it looks silly.. and i am kissing it every 2 seconds
2. why do some people matters so very much without one justifiable reason..
3. i should die before any of my loved ones
4. the puff is now on my little finger... :p... and i am making weird signs.. aww.. rahul kee yaad aa gayi.. i love him so much.. esp. his love you messages.
5. palash sen.. i can actually marry a guy with a voice like that
6. why was vishu bhaiya talking about my marriage ..woh bhee har doosra sentence -_-
7. i love vishu bhaiya like loons.. like he is everything i wish to be.. actually a mixture of him and taru bhai
8. the puff back to my pointing finger.. hey ricky ponting.. god.. i hate him hey..i heard lee's girl misses him.. hey i am glad i am single.. and hey.. i plan to remain so forever..esp. with brothers like mine :p
9. i am joining a gym soon.. i don't even know why..
10. the puff's in my mouth :p


WHAT DO I DO NEXT ???

The sky is falling

Howling orphan, moaning widow...
A shattered glass window...

Look up there...
The heaven just lost her love...
Falling down her corpse... these blame-worthy drops...

A streak of light...
Separation stained thunders...
On her knees now... this hapless whore...

Blood see-through, tears unfathomed...
Grey of mascara blackening fear...
Her folded limbs... she knows no reason...

The sky is falling...
No monsoon...
The sky is falling...
A cloudburst...

Exhausted bride, unborn child...
A tamed tide's wild...

Tresses spread across...
A carcass raped recent...
Diminishing light of life... Evitable ends encroach

A freak's disguise
Some silent scourge stills...
Misted fading vision... difficult to choose one he...

Veins outlined silver, white wails wronged...
Rouge outdone reddening disgust
Her devastated dreams... She lost her rhyme...

The sky is falling...
No monsoon...
The sky is falling...
A cloudburst...

A blood-stained aisle...
He never looked back...
Her lover...the untamed sovereign
The cheater... An apparent ocean

Hidden beneath the obvious...
Veiled under the visible...
Her womb... the cloud...
The father... an unseen marine

A wronged rejoice...
He isn't who he seems...
Her deity...the feral fiend...
The swindler...a perceived devotee

Buried below the witnessed...
Masked behind the major...
Her cry... his separation...
The maker... now destroying...


"She is too weak to fight back...too heavy to face another self-rage...so she wipes out the signs of unison...in ways to ensure it's existence is never believed...so she tears off a million pieces and throws each with a curse… a curse of her self being...and she does it for us to celebrate.. her agony.. her pain "

The sky was falling...
You grew sucking her blood...
The sky was falling...
You misunderstood...